Squiggly Circle

I never know how to start something… so then I just don’t. A friend of mine told me to “just draw the circle first and then perfect as you go”. So this blog, this website, this season is just…a squiggly circle. I do keep a journal in my google drive that I type in because writing hurts my dainty little baby hand. I also hold my pencil like a psychopath, but thats neither here nor there. I am also committed to not using chatGPT for anything creative I use or write so if there’s typos just SHUT UP no there’s not.

Today is day 7 of no vaping and no marijuana. The weed was easy to let go of- I only would take 1-3 hits before bed every night. It was moreso the routine that was difficult. The nicotine vape has SUCKED. Fuck… I have to be honest… I took like 3 hits from a vape yesterday because I found one in a drawer and I wanted to see if it still worked. Wow that’s a stupid justification. I wonder if it’s still around here somewhere. Oh, no, I drowned it in my sink. I guess that’s for the best. I also wonder if there’s another one hiding around here. NO LAYLA YOU’VE COMMITTED. This first blog post is pure chaos. whatever.

I am going to use these blog posts to jot down my unorganized thoughts. To type the dialogue that’s constantly yelling in my head.

Why did I just get so much anxiety. Perhaps because I’ve had nothing but coffee and Ritalin today. I should drink more water. So boring. I’m done for now. Bye.